Bad Bad Day

Yesterday I had to do the hardest thing I’ve ever done.  My Nakoman, my little buddy, was sick and suffering.  We tried two vets, but in the end he was too sick to save with any chance of a real life going forward.  I chose to euthanize him and give him a peaceful ending instead of prolonging the inevitable and adding miserable weeks/months to his life. 

I can’t get into how much I loved him or I’ll start to cry again.  I’ve already cried more tears than I previously have in my entire life combined.  He’s been my shadow for over 10 years now and our house feels so big and empty without him.  I just keep expecting him to jump in my lap or meet me at the door.  His death has left a hole in me I can’t explain.

We love you Nako and will miss you.  Rest in peace my little buddy.

More Time Off

Sam is back to work but hasn’t been quite right.  I’m not sure what the deal is – our regular vet has been out of the country and is coming to see him tomorrow.  He doesn’t seem to want to bring his right hind forward and he looks like two horse front to back when he canters.  I’m freaked out but don’t want to get upset prematurely.  Tomorrow the vet is going to look at him for lameness and neurological issues.  He’s also getting chiro/massage, so hopefully this helps!

For me, it’s been a tough couple of weeks.  I strained my shoulder and tore my back where I originally injured it two years ag0.  The doctor prescribed LOTS of drugs and time off the horse.  Last weekend was especially bad as I had a reaction to some of the medication and couldn’t stop crying over every little thing.  I was so embarrassed- felt like a crazy lady!  Things are better now, though.  I’m not in so much pain and am no longer taking any medication other than celebrex for the inflammation in my back. 

Fri/Sat we had a saddle fitter in from Germany.  I got back on the old schoolmaster and he adjusted Sam’s saddle and made it sit up a little more than normal to give me more support with my back.  D thinks this will help and wants me to get back on Sam soon.  I was tempted to hop on tonight but the barn was closed when I got out there.

What now?!?

The last couple days have been iffy.  Somehow I hurt my shoulder and can hardly hold my left rein.  I tried to ignore it and didn’t tell anyone.  Of course D was like “What’s wrong with your left side?  Do you feel your arm?” and I had to tell him that I had hurt something.  I think he was a little upset that I didn’t tell him, but I’m tired of being injured! 

Went to the doctor today and they don’t really know what the deal is except that the tendons are really aggravated and enflamed.

Told them I was planning to ride a horse tonight and then just looked at me strange.  I rode the old schoolmaster tonight and he was good as always.  We had a much easier time to the right, but rode without a whip and he stayed light and easy.

D says he’s a perfect horse for me right now.  The old schoolmaster is kind of annoying but I have to agree.  He’s comfy, even when I’m hurting, is a good size for me (maybe 17.1?), and is always reliable if a little crabby.

Love my horse

Two blogs in one day- crazy!  Anyway, I read a lot about racing and OTTBs and couldn’t help but thinking- I LOVE my horse.  In my current world of fancy dressage horses and back issues, I still love my Sam.  Even after the accident and the fact that I now spend a ridiculous amount of money on him, I don’t think I could ever sell him.  He is exactly what I wanted when I picked him out- a horse with a lot of go but with a sensible personality and brains.  Wish I could handle that now, but I am weirdly okay with being his groom.  Hopefully soon I’ll be ready to ride and enjoy him again.

WEG Week

Went with L to WEG in Lexington to watch Monday-Tuesday’s team dressage competition.  All I can say is UNBELIEVABLE!  We had a great time and I just want to learn and get better!

I  got back Wednesday morning and rode that night.  I had a really good ride on L’s horse.  He’s a difficult horse to trot- throws you around quite a bit with his big gaits and stops as soon as you lose an inch of your position.  Well, no issues Wednesday!  I guess it was a little hard on my back, though and the rest of the week has been rough.  Today I rode the old schoolmaster and we worked on sitting trot with really long reins (almost on the buckle but still with a light contact).  It was kind of hard and made me really rely on my core to sit and steer!  This should help give me a more independent seat and will help me mentally to give Sam more rein.

The good news is that I haven’t ridden inside with mirrors for a while up until today.  My position has improved so much!  I was really happy with what I saw.

9/20/2010 More obsessing over my seat

So today I rode Bird Brain again and focused on recreating my seat from yesterday.  It worked again at the walk and then we got some really nice trot work.  Of course D was in the other room and missed all of the trot work.  I was afraid I would be too tired to replicate it when he came back but we did!  We even got a couple “Gooooooods” from him.  Can’t believe how excited I am to go trot in circles again!

9/19/10 I have muscles?

So I’ve decided to start working with the personal trainer again.  I am gaining weight at a frightening pace and am still too weak in the core to ride well.

The trainer also does physical therapy for one of the trainers out at the barn so he understands what is needed to be a good rider.  We started last Thursday and my back (which had been cranky all week) is feeling SO much better.  We worked out Thurs. and Sat. and he gave me a pilates routine to do in between.  I HATE HATE HATE working out but I think I may stick to it this time as my back feels so much better after I work it.

We are focusing on core and lower body strength with lots of stretching and balance exercises and some free weights sprinkled in.  We’ve discovered a few things that could be creating issues in my riding (aside from the bad back).  

The biggest thing is (ok and now this post is going to get really weird) that I have a hard time isolating muscles and recruiting them for support.  For example, trainer asked me to flex my hamstrings without tightening my quads and it was IMPOSSIBLE.  No wonder I grip at the posting trot!  He gave me an assignment to work on body awareness/isolation and I am just fascinated with it.

Today I tried to activate my hamstrings on Bird Brain.  Something good happened!  I *think” I was able to lengthen my leg and Bird Brain rounded nicely.  He’s hard to put on the bit at the walk so this was kind of a big deal.  The trot still sucked because I started leaning forward and lost it.  I am planning to play with it more tomorrow.